When I took my first breath, when my eyes blinked and a tear dribbled down my cheek for the very first time, I bet no one ever guessed those needy hungry screams would grow into pure insanity. The everlasting curse that dwells in the shadows of my conscience has been busy dropping weights of pessimism in my stomach, attempting to ignite my nerves and anxiety.
Today has been a struggle to reach above the water that is drowning my mind. Do I let myself sink into delirium, fight or just submerge into the next wave and disappear. For now I think i'll swim into the sweet blissful void of hardcore music.
iTunes > letlive. > The Dope Beat
I've been busy these last few weeks. A new puppy (Albus, the french bulldog) was welcomed into our little family. A new delightful bundle of energy and fun, lifting spirits and smacking smiles on prude winter faces. He is a mutant baby of a pig, gremlin, bat and a potato. I have only known the little dude on a first name basis for a week and already I absolutely adore him.
My new passport arrived from New Zealand. I am going to begin the new year across the world, back where I began. It has projected sunshine onto 2014 already. I've also been organising christmas plans. The festivities this year are looking quite exciting. If only time could pass a little faster.
I got to see Arcane Roots... As if I am going to write about Arcane fricking Roots again. I'm questioning just how much longer that band will lure over me and my headphones. It still feels like it hasn't been long enough, not really.
Last week lover boy and I attended their London gig at xoyo. It was raw, electrifying and breathtaking (Putting boring technical hitches aside). Their courageous talent and strong cult support filled the basement venue with a tense, invigorating atmosphere. I'm keen for their show in December located down the road at The Boiler room.
It was the perfect anniversary celebration. Our actual anniversary was a shambles, typical of my luck this year. I did however treat us to those gig tickets, which swayed and postponed the romantics to that slightly later date.
It has been 3 years. Officially my longest relationship and biggest roller coaster ride of emotional turmoil. I am with my best-est ever of friends. At least some aspects in my life, such as my love, always rise above the wreckage. Undeniably utterly irrevocably felicitously in love.
One day I'll have it all figured out. The most important people, moments and truths will emerge, remain and anchor my optimism. I won't have to turn to Jason Butler, the letlive crew and the other heroic musicians in my iTunes library for a distraction and temporary sense of comfort and strength.